If all the pilots on an Airbus get an attack of gastritis at the same time, mid flight, what would happen ?

Other answer:

Robert:
A skilled pilot can talk a non-pilot through the steps to land a modern jet airliner. This has been proven in the simulator many times.

But in reality, many airports are equipped with systems to allow the autopilot to land the plane. That would be even safer than having a novice human land it.

fgr_cl:
The same as it would on a Boeing. Except there's a lower risk of hitting the yoke with the knees when leaving to the restroom in a hurry because there's no yoke to hit.

Why does it have to be an Airbus anyway?

lowlevel:
They'd get the flight attendants to land the plane… using the FMS and autopilot to do a Category IIIB autoland at an airport that is equipped for it… All they would have to do is keep it straight after touchdown and deploy the thrust reversers.
King:
Won't happen: pilots do not eat at the same time and always have different meals.
just "JR":
Won't happen: pilots do not eat at the same time and always have different meals.
Parsons:
They would expel the anonymous gas, anonymously.
USAFisnumber1:
They would turn on the autopilot, take antacids and tough it out.
Robert S:
Nothing
Adam:
They would expel the anonymous gas, anonymously.
STEPHEN:
The cockpit would really stink.